While looking through my files in search of something else (obviously) I stumbled upon the list of requirement from my senior writing workshop. They read,
No crying, and absolutely no single tears.
No vomiting, except in cases of drunkenness or illness.
No opening the mouth without speaking.
(I have to admit, I had been guilty of the vomiting thing.)
Other rules for this class included, but were not limited to:
Double space everything, and print only on one side of the paper. No, I don’t care what the college says. Writers hate trees.
I will lock the door behind me. Don’t knock; if you arrive after me, you cannot come in.
In the (unlikely) event that anyone ever asks me to lead a workshop I will adopt all these rules.